Me and My MH

So as an introduction.. thought i’d say a little about my MH(Mental Health) experience.

I’ve been diagnosed with MH for over 20 years and have been medicated for most of them, during this time I have at times been so ill that I could not leave the house, or talk to anyone, and on occasion have walked out of my home as I believed I was a danger to my loved ones. I have also worked during most of this time, although I started this site following a 2 year period of severe MH, where I lost my business, suffered serious financial issues and was potentially the worse I had ever been.

I seriously believe that we need to discuss MH, in the same way as we discuss other health disabilities, only by talking to others, sharing our experiences and listening to theirs will people better understand, and I have found being open also makes it easier for people to accept and support when MH declines.

It is not something to hide from your employer, your friends, your family, your children or your lover. By hiding it you are not opening yourself up to the support and help these people can provide. As a MH sufferer I do know that each of our experiences are unique, and all I can talk about is mine and temper that with information/conversations I have had with other sufferers.

Also by being open with these people, they can be open with you when they think you are struggling.

It is important to remember that there are many very capable people living with MH, who run their own businesses, entertain us in the media, compete in sport, represent us in parliment, drive us on public transport ….. you get the picture. Being a MH sufferer, does not stop any of us doing anything, being anyone, and achieving our dreams. It may at times require more work, have to be put on hold. or need help from others to succeed, but thats true for everyone.

Whilst suffering from MH I have at times felt like the loneliest extrovert, as it has been possible to be surrounded by friends and family and still feel heart wrenchingly alone and isolated.

I suffer from suicidal depression due to low self esteem, there are times where I believe I am totally worthless and that the best way I can help my loved ones is to not exist. Due to the extreme low self worth, I also am unable to impact another directly through my suicidal actions, this has resulted in me ceasing a suicide attempt because some one phoned me, and I have used this compulsion to control urges by purposefully holding telephone conversations when I am struggling with my suicidal urges.

For now I think this is a good place to leave off..